Can't you see me ?

Sometimes I envy those who have best friends. Or even good friends. Sometimes I wonder why can't I have what they have.
Maybe I'm trying to hard to fit in when in reality, I simply can't. Maybe I'm that sort of guy whom people find nice to have around but not to hang out with. Maybe I'm not cool enough. Maybe I'm not smart enough. Maybe I'm that middle guy that just doesn't belong to any side.
Because this has been true all my life. I've never been a part of any group. I don't believe I'm such an individualistic that I shunt group life. Yes, I hate being in a crowd and I love my occasional alone time but that's about the extent of it. My happiest time is still when I'm with a bunch of friends or someone dear. I love my friends perhaps more than my own family.
But no one has ever said to me that they care about me, save for two.
And I ask myself from time to time, what must I do to be accepted. What did I do wrong.
I just don't want to be that invisible man all my life.

I feel so lonely sometimes